Category: Guests

Inspiration for my post subjects comes in sets of three. One incident occurs, then a second. After the third happens, the muse speaks something to this effect: “You couldn’t make this stuff up!” Today, amidst the crowd of tourists, conventioneers, and business folks–even the mayor and his security detail at one point–they lurked. The liars.…

A friend who just started reading this blog, despaired at the descriptions of some of our guests. “I have been that customer, I know I have,” she admitted. No, I don’t think so. Not THAT customer. I wouldn’t have friends–never will–who are THAT customer. I have been out with acquaintances or former coworkers who behave…

There is one absolute if you work in a restaurant: You will never need to buy an umbrella. A dozen or so are left behind every week–on tabletops, in seats, under tables, on coat hooks–even on days when it’s not raining! Sometimes, a person comes back several days later to claim one, offering this description:…

Hi folks. I understand you are on Spring break. I understand this entitles you to wear shorts and tank tops and just about anything else that screams, “I am not a person who hails from a city.” (Or at least this city.) I understand you may feel a bit more relaxed, more jovial, more inclined…

Mondays. A rainy Monday at that. Yesterday, however, we had a steady stream of conventioneers, tourists, and regulars. I marveled at how easy it is to meet and greet 300 covers when they space themselves out in 3- to 5-minute increments. (Visit my foyer at noon on a Friday–like multiple buses letting all the famished…

Sir. You wearing the beret. Standing directly in front of my podium. I see you, and I assure you I know you want a table. Fanning a menu in my face is not necessary to gain my attention. Madam. My hearing is quite keen. When I tell you I don’t see your name in our…

Everyone wants a booth. “Can I have a booth?” “Any booths left?” “A booth would be great.” Okay, okay, we get it. So, the designers of my recently opened restaurant installed booths all over the place–some seat four, some can take on 5, others comfortably hold 6 adults. Thus, no shortage of booths in any…

It is incredibly easy to write about restaurant customers who irritate and aggravate. Although they are actually a tiny minority of the hundreds I see each day, they tend to inspire unending prose! Mostly, customers come and go in unremarkable waves, neither standing out nor striking fear and loathing. But a few are fantastic, and…

You got on the bus early this morning and asked the driver for a paper transfer. He told you the electronic fare card would automatically calculate the transfer on the next bus. “No it won’t. I need the paper,” you told him. “Ma’am, really, the fare card takes care of it. Trust me.” “I want…

A bit of history: Six years ago, we took a bare-bones trip to Amsterdam with our teenagers. We were booked into a so-called two-star hotel that was only a slight step above a hostel–and I am confident many of those would have been better. (The perils of online booking back then.) My husband and I…