After you have taken a risk in your personal life and shared a simple kiss with a man whom you will likely not see again–someone who is not the man to whom you have been married for multiple decades and who was previously the only man you had kissed in those multiple decades,
after you have taken a risk in your work life and put forth a few suggestions, only to be soundly rejected and not so subtly scolded for doing so,
after you have faced your writer’s block that is now a cinderblock wall, longer and thicker than any you’ve experienced in the multiple decades you have been writing,
after you have seriously wondered if the past five months are a surreal dream from which you will wake up, if only you try hard enough to ease your eyes open,
you receive a text from someone to whom you thought you had explained very clearly that you just aren’t the gal for him,
and he says, “Hope u r not alone and are doing well.”
At which moment you absolutely see that you are, after all,
and that you are very, very much alone.