Sure, Put Your Feet Up!

Whining rant alert:

Why does the occasional guy wearing obviously expensive, some-kind-of-skin boots feel it is absolutely appropriate to stretch out and prop their feet up in a booth? I have seen this done more than a few times.

What is it with seated guests reaching out and poking my arm when I walk by their table? “Miss,” poke, poke, poke. “Miss!” poke, poke, poke a little harder. “Gimme some toothpicks, okay?” I’m long ago over the “gimme” issue. It’s the poking that has been driving me a bit mad of late.

And is showing the back of one’s hand and waving me away the only way to say, “Not just yet, thank you.”

I meet, greet, and thank almost everyone who comes into the restaurant. So do all the hosts and all the managers. I am still puzzled when the response is a glare followed by silence.

And those menus–they’re really just menus. Combs work much better to brush back hair.

I try to avoid writing posts that paint a picture of all guests as thoughtless and hapless, because they aren’t, of course. And angry or happy, demanding or not, they are the guests and they pay my salary. But sometimes, like tonight, I wonder, did a memo go out? It was that kind of a Tuesday night.

Oh, what the hell. Come on in, put your feet up, stay a while. Poke, poke, poke–okay?






7 responses to “Sure, Put Your Feet Up!”

  1. Katie Avatar

    Don’t touch me, don’t call me sweetie or any other “pet” name, don’t talk to me when I am dealing with another guest. I will take care of you I promise. Sometimes people just need a clue!

  2. Robin in Ohio Avatar
    Robin in Ohio

    Dear RG,
    Are you sure you’re not working in an elementary school? I’m a teacher and our young children (grades K-2) sometimes do the same types of things (poke to get attention, put their feet up, demand items such as crayons and scissors) but we work with them and try to teach them good manners. It’s too bad some of your patrons obviously didn’t pay attention to those early childhood lessons.

    I’ll think of you today while I gently correct and guide the future generation of restaurant patrons. LOL!!!

    Hang in there, RG. Everyone needs to vent now and then. In my profession, we talk about clueless and messed up parents when we’re frustrated.

  3. Julie Avatar

    I’m on the same wavelength as Robin. While I’m not a teacher, I’ve done my fare share of taking care of other people’s children.

    I had dinner with two children three times a week for years. When we’d go out, they were great — ordering for themselves, sitting and talking with whomever was at the table, rarely fighting with each other. They should be good patrons when they grow up.

    I go out now and I see kids making sculptures out of their macaroni and cheese or running around and screaming. They’re already being trained to be obnoxious when they’re adults. (And I can’t imagine the teenage years!)

  4. Brave Astronaut Avatar

    I have always found that snapping fingers works really well . . . 🙂

    My wife has an internal clock when we go out to restaurants. If the service is slow, she will suddenly realize that the food we ordered some time ago has yet to appear, she will catch our server’s eye and ask a simple, “How we doing?”

    Having worked in customer service, I will aver strongly that you will get much further with the pleasing looks and questions than the “where the hell is my food” approach.

    I will admit to the occasional feet up infraction, but then again I’m just lazy.

    But definitely no poking . . .

  5. Tinker Avatar

    Just a comment on language that may cheer you up a bit since you last couple of posts seem to indicate you are down a bit.

    “A new one got sprung on me recently at a restaurant in Whitehall, Michigan.

    The menu listed “elmo” for the reasonable price of $1.50. I asked the waitress what it was.

    “You’re kidding,” she said. I assured her I wasn’t kidding.

    “You know, like when you want your pie ‘elmo’? It’s really ice cream, but we call it elmo in restaurants.”

    She shook her head sadly.”

    Took me a while toi figure out the words even with that clue.

  6. Kim Ayres Avatar

    If you snap the little finger back sharply and quickly, it breaks with amazing ease. They might think twice about poking you next time…

  7. Gypsy Avatar

    My mantra lately? People suck and you can’t please everyone. Bitter? Jaded? Yes. But mostly true.