D.C.: Business casual during the week, including collared golf shirts and khakis for men, and slightly more cute, conservative tops for the women in their khakis–skirts or pants.
Here: Interesting casual all the time, including flip flops on men wearing khakis and flowing linen shirts, and women wearing tops plunging way past there. To work?
D.C.: Cropped, neatly styled hair, for both men and women. Sedate highlights for women, always in need of a touch up, because everyone is too busy to get to the salon on a timely basis.
Here: Ponytails, collar-length and wildly messy hair for men. So many shades of blond for women, almost no roots showing. How can that be?
D.C.: Expensive jeans and strappy tops for women going out for dinner on a weekend night.
Here: Tight, tight, tight colorful dresses–tiers and ruffles optional–no matter your figure, no matter your age. Some jeans, but these are paired with tighter and even lower plunging tops.
D.C.: Getting work done before dinner, then working more after dinner.
Here: Everyone, I mean everyone, looks like they’ve had work done. Am I in L.A.?
D.C.: I am entitled to that table. My name is sometimes in the news.
Here: I am entitled to that table. I just am.
D.C.: I know the owner (except they rarely do).
Here: I know the owner (good God, they all really do).
D.C.: Hey doll, you on the menu? (Think to self, “F— off.” Actually say, nothing. Then, glare in response and dwell on what assholes those guys are. Who would say such a thing?)
Here: Hey doll, you on the menu? (Think to self, “Please, sir, come up with something more original than that line I’ve heard five times tonight.” Actually say, nothing. Then, smile and kind of laugh, and forget about the assholes a second later. Everyone says such a thing–or is thinking it, because you can read that look pretty well after a few days.)
D.C.: Eat by 6:30 p.m. at the latest on a weeknight and go home.
Here: Eat by 10 p.m. at the latest on a weeknight and go home.
D.C.: Thunderstorm warnings.
Here: Hopefully, no hurricane warnings, but scary thunderstorms every day!
D.C.: So completely and totally familiar.
Here: What planet did I land on?
D.C.: I miss it, just a little.
Here: I will not miss D.C. at all come November, when it is still summer here and cold and rainy there.