D.C. vs. Here

D.C.: Business casual during the week, including collared golf shirts and khakis for men, and slightly more cute, conservative tops for the women in their khakis–skirts or pants.

Here: Interesting casual all the time, including flip flops on men wearing khakis and flowing linen shirts, and women wearing tops plunging way past there. To work?

D.C.: Cropped, neatly styled hair, for both men and women. Sedate highlights for women, always in need of a touch up, because everyone is too busy to get to the salon on a timely basis.

Here: Ponytails, collar-length and wildly messy hair for men. So many shades of blond for women, almost no roots showing. How can that be?

D.C.: Expensive jeans and strappy tops for women going out for dinner on a weekend night.

Here: Tight, tight, tight colorful dresses–tiers and ruffles optional–no matter your figure, no matter your age. Some jeans, but these are paired with tighter and even lower plunging tops.

D.C.: Getting work done before dinner, then working more after dinner.

Here: Everyone, I mean everyone, looks like they’ve had work done. Am I in L.A.?

D.C.: I am entitled to that table. My name is sometimes in the news.

Here: I am entitled to that table. I just am.

D.C.: I know the owner (except they rarely do).

Here: I know the owner (good God, they all really do).

D.C.: Hey doll, you on the menu? (Think to self, “F— off.” Actually say, nothing. Then, glare in response and dwell on what assholes those guys are. Who would say such a thing?)

Here: Hey doll, you on the menu? (Think to self, “Please, sir, come up with something more original than that line I’ve heard five times tonight.” Actually say, nothing. Then, smile and kind of laugh, and forget about the assholes a second later. Everyone says such a thing–or is thinking it, because you can read that look pretty well after a few days.)

D.C.: Eat by 6:30 p.m. at the latest on a weeknight and go home.

Here: Eat by 10 p.m. at the latest on a weeknight and go home.

D.C.: Thunderstorm warnings.

Here: Hopefully, no hurricane warnings, but scary thunderstorms every day!

D.C.: So completely and totally familiar.

Here: What planet did I land on?

D.C.: I miss it, just a little.

Here: I will not miss D.C. at all come November, when it is still summer here and cold and rainy there.

Here: Right?






11 responses to “D.C. vs. Here”

  1. Kim Ayres Avatar

    A few weeks and it’ll feel like you’ve always been able to breeze through the job. Glad to read you’re beginning to settle in. Hope the new apartment works out

  2. Lisa Avatar

    “So many shades of blond for women, almost no roots showing. How can that be?

    That’s what happens when you spend the whole day basking in the sun.

    Great comparison list! Enjoy your weekend!! 🙂

  3. Induced Homomorphism Avatar

    They actually do know the owner there? Where are you, Kansas or something? Even in my hometown in the Midwest, it’s big enough so that never happens.

  4. Katie Avatar

    If you begin to miss D.C. it’s because it’s D.C. not because of the weather.

  5. Junior Avatar

    You must be in the south (FLA?)..

    I love the people down there..

    you’ll be saying Ya’ll in no time…

  6. Suz Avatar

    RG, I’m reading your blog, just too busy to reply most days. You appear to be healthy, normal, and adjusting well. Good luck as you move through the next weeks that will solidify your self-esteem and soothe your aching heart. I’ll be on very limited internet access for August, but I’ll check your blog when I do manage to be on. Best to you!!

  7. Ex-Restaurant Manager Avatar

    To Junior: Everything south of Orlando is not the South. Those people are not from the “South”. They’ve never heard of Sweet Tea, or Please, or Thank You, Ma’am. They are transplants, so you would not like them.

    Well, Gal, welcome to Florida. The real “Silicone Valley”. Bigger boobs, whiter smiles, less wrinkles, microwaved skin. Very transitory, but can be truly fun.

    For Lisa: That blond hair has nothing to do with the sun. South Florida probably has more tanning booths and bleach shops than Minneapolis.

  8. Julie Avatar

    I’ve moved all over this country of ours. You might have inspired me enough to write a San Francisco vs. Brooklyn vs. Chicago. They’re all so different from each other.

    It sounds like the part of Florida you’re in is similar to the Phoenix/Tempe/Scottsdale area. You can tell who’s had their boobs done because they wear the most revealing tops so that you don’t miss out on seeing them in all their glory.

  9. Artful Dodger Avatar

    Business casual….khakis and golf shirts? In South Texas its more like Wrangler Jeans and cowboys hats. No wait that’s formal wear at weddings. Depending on what side of town your on. ^_^

  10. kgrrrl Avatar

    wow – ex-rest is really sore about that eh? lol!
    I’ve been to south -florida on quite a few occassions and yes, they do say y’all, a lot and have more accents than those up north (hello, they trasnplant from somewhere, maybe south?)
    I lived in LA for awhile too and the only way I could tell how old some woman was by her hands – look for that down there – could be very amusing for you!
    My fav was seeing this OLD guy with younger girl… until you saw her hands… yikes, I think she was actually older than him!
    sunshine is good for anyone’s disposition.

  11. Ex-Restaurant Manager Avatar

    kgrrrl – Not sore. More like bemused. Those folk down there actually think they’re fooling people. And you’re so right about their “Mummy Hands”.